Kids Really Do Say the Strangest Things

I have to admit that I love kids. I love to see how they look at life. Since I was a little one I also loved great wordplay. I am a man who one day will spend heavy time in the punitentury. I love good puns and great misuse of words for humors sake.

A friend I made a few years ago now has a toddler and told me a story about a conversation with her toddler that just brought a smile to my face. Kids don’t always hear the words or phrases we use properly. As was the case by the email sent to me.

This little toddler was discovered sitting cross legged on the kitchen floor. With a big jar of peanut butter between his legs and a spoon filled with a huge gob of peanut butter ready to be scooped into his already peanut butter covered mouth.

His mom asked, “What are you DOING?!”

This intelligent 4 year old replied, “Just having lunch.”

“WHAT?! How is that lunch?”, Mom inquired.

The little guy then correctly stated his thoughts. “I’m having a PB-in-my-belly sandwich. My bones and guts are the bread.”

There was clearly a lot of thought put into the ideas the little guy had. Taking a “PB and Jelly” and switching it to “PB-in-my-belly” just cracked me up.

Any goofy phrases you have heard little one’s misuse, or create on their own? Please do share.

For me, as a little kid, there was one thing I remember doing that brought a pretty big chuckle to a funeral. I know, I know, it’s not right to make folks laugh at a funeral. But I wasn’t even three at that time. I just remember asking this question and not getting a good answer from my dad, he just hustled me out of the funeral home as quickly as he could.

The neighbor behind us had passed away. An older gentleman. My dad brought me up to the casket to see him one last time and I turned to my dad and, according to legend, I didn’t ask the question as quiet as I remember. You see I remember whispering it to my dad. But the “claim” is that I yelled it rather loud.

“Dad, why is he sleeping in that suitcase? Who sleeps in a suitcase?”

It was at least 10 years later that the widow, who still lived behind our house, told me that my comment caused her the biggest laugh she had that week.


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